Friday, September 9, 2016

Genericide Update: Illegal Ear Lending

Friends! Countrymen! Lend me your ears! Or, y’know, don’t. I have nothing important to say. Also, readers need not be citizens of the US to lend me your ears. Out-of-countrymen are also welcome to lend me your ears. But in interest of stimulating my local economy, only countrymen are permitted to lend me the full ear. Foreigners will be limited to lending me their outer ear, no further into the canal than the ear drum. If I catch any illegal immigrants trying to lend me their Cochlea we’re going to have to get the authorities involved.

Anyway! I continue to have lackluster excuses for my blog’s lack of luster. The Super Paper Mario articles are ending up with some rewritten sections in addition to earlier issues. If it’s any consolation, these multi-part articles I’ve been trying lately are written basically at random. Like a nervous cop at a crime scene, I sketch the outlines then run away screaming. Some segments take longer than others, some take so long they become an article all themselves, and everything has to be reshuffled so my already lengthy prose doesn’t put you all to sleep.

I’ve already got a few ideas for articles to write after our month long avalanche of Super Paper Mario. I know some of my actual confirmed readers thirst for more Oblivion, so that’ll continue intermittently. But it’s so hard to find the time to write these days that I’ve played plenty of things I haven’t had time to describe. Related note: If any of you readers actually feel like speaking up, I’d be interested to hear what you think of the multi-part articles. I feel like they let me cover a game more thoroughly while also allowing me to get down to the juicy topics I feel passionate about. There’s certainly less variety due to the time they take, and that’s a shame. But at the same time, looking back at a lot of my old reviews they get so bogged down with “and now I have to talk about X as if this was an official, comprehensive review” that they don’t say much meaningful or unique. Pretty sure I’ve said as much before, but hey, it’s hard to talk about nothing every week without colorful ear metaphors.

So that’s all for now. I’m sure you’re all frustrated with the lack of content, so I’ll have to really nail the end of this post to win back your affections.


No, you’re right, I don’t what I was thinking. I’ll have to try a lot harder than that.


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